pumpkin_hollow Inbox

[rexthebuilder]

I can't come to the phone right now because I'm either kicking EVO butt or hanging out with friends. Leave a message after the beep, and I'll get back to you pronto!

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[rexthebuilder]

Rex knows he's being baited and gleefully takes the bait. "Aw, come on, little kids are tiny. How hard can they be?"

[pineapplesalmon]

"First off, they're escape artists that try to kill themselves constantly if you even look away for a second. Secondly, they need constant stimulation and attention if you want them to be happy and their brains to be grow. Thirdly—" And this is when César springs his trap with a widening grin. "—they can't make their own meals and aren't potty-trained, so you gotta change their diapers."

[rexthebuilder]

"NO!" Rex rolls right off his brother onto the other side and onto the rug, extremely dramatically.

[pineapplesalmon]

"Yup!" Oh, this is 'revenge' for something.

[rexthebuilder]

"You did not change my diapers!" The neighbors probably heard that, Rex, good job.

[pineapplesalmon]

César just barks out a laugh and grins over to him.

[rexthebuilder]

That's all the horrible confirmation that Rex needs, and he buries his face in his hands, moaning. "NoooooOOOOOOOOooooooOOOOOOOoooooo."

[pineapplesalmon]

And César just laughs at him. "Maybe you can do the same for my kids."

[rexthebuilder]

Rex goes silent and shifts his hands so that one is free to point at César, which is close enough that it just becomes prodding between his ribs. "I'm absolutely traumatizing your kids in sixteen years, and then you'll have to pay for their therapy, too."

[pineapplesalmon]

César gives a little 'ow!' at the rib prodding. "Deal."

[rexthebuilder]

"Cool. Hold on, need to die for a minute." And Rex just goes limp, hand sliding off his face and the other one thudding down as he bends his elbow.

[pineapplesalmon]

César sits up and gets out his pocket watch for affect; he can time a minute himself, but this is funnier. After a minute, he speaks up.

"So, think you're about ready to go? Anything else we need to speak about privately?"

[rexthebuilder]

Rex opens one eye to look at him. "Nope, think I'm cool." He sits up with both eyes open. "Learned enough of the deep Salazar lore for one day. If I learn anymore, my brain's going to explode all over your itchy rug."

[pineapplesalmon]

César pats him on the shoulder affectionately, then stands and offers Rex his hand. "I'll make it up to you tomorrow by making one of Mama's best recipes."

[rexthebuilder]

Rex grabs that hand so fast and yanks himself up so forcefully that César almost falls over. "Heck yeah, heal my trauma and buy my silence with good food every day of the week for a month, and then maybe I'll forgive you!"

[pineapplesalmon]

César's laughter is rumbling. "We cook every night, Rex."

[rexthebuilder]

"Yessssss!"

[pineapplesalmon]

Oh for the love of.... "Rex, neighbors? Night time?"

[rexthebuilder]

"Yessssss!"

[pineapplesalmon]

He's never seen someone this excited over home-cooked meals. Apparently Rex really likes normalcy. ... then again, so does Magne.

César ruffles Rex's hair as he walks past him, rolling his eyes in amusement. "Somehow, I think our lives here are about ready to get a lot louder."

[rexthebuilder]

"And a lot less boring." Rex follows, proud of himself for reasons unknown to anyone but him.

FIN~!

[pineapplesalmon]

César looks back to Rex with a warm smile. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."